The view from our new President’s chambers

I don’t know exactly where the President of the Family Division’s chambers are located, but it must be a lofty perch. From it, the President evidently has a clear view of all he (or she) surveys. Accordingly, it has become a tradition that they should provide us lesser mortals with a picture of all that is wrong with the family justice system (and a pathway to how we should put it right), and our new President Sir Andrew McFarlane is continuing that tradition.

Unfortunately, our new President’s first View from his perch was published on a site behind a paywall, at least until that fact was pointed out (it now also appears on the Courts and Tribunals Judiciary website). Hopefully, this was just an oversight from a man new to the system, and all future Views will be free to, err… view.

So, what does the View contain?

Well, actually not a lot that is new. Much of what he wrote about refers to the ‘workload challenge’ faced by the family justice system as a result of the increase in children cases over the last few years, a topic that Sir Andrew already dealt with in more detail (as he says in the View) in his speech to the Association of Lawyers for Children Conference 2018 back in November, that I commented upon here in this post.

In a nutshell Sir Andrew is fearful that the stress of the workload, “in a system which is already sparely manned in terms of lawyers, court staff and judges”, will “risk the burn‐out of key and valued individuals”. His solution to this, or at least part of his solution, is to allow some corners to be cut, and some time limits to be exceeded.

Think of that for a moment. I find it quite remarkable that the man at the very top of the family justice system is advocating the cutting of corners. Surely, such a situation would have been unthinkable only a few short years ago? I’m not saying that Sir Andrew is wrong to make such a suggestion, just that the fact that he has is an indication of just what a state the system has found itself in. That state, of course, is not just due to the increase in children cases. It is also a result of years of under-funding by the government, and of the swinging legal aid cuts, that have (as was entirely foreseeable) burdened the system with a mass of litigants in person, who require extra judicial resources to deal with.

Of course, Sir Andrew is not talking of corner-cutting that will cause unsound outcomes, or that will adversely affect the welfare of children caught up in the family justice system. He makes a few suggestions of the sort of thing he has in mind, including setting the earliest and latest times that courts are expected to sit (how does this fit with the extended court hours pilot announced by HM Courts & Tribunals Service and the Ministry of Justice last November?); agreeing the latest time in the evening, and the earliest time in the morning, when it is acceptable to send an email to another lawyer in a case or to the court; and reducing the components to be  expected in a ‘Position  Statement’  to the minimum required, for example simply one side of A4, using bullet points. Quite what effect these things will have upon the workload of those involved in the family justice system, we will have to wait and see.

Otherwise, the View has little else to say. Sir Andrew does mention a couple of other news items of which we are already aware, such as the expansion of the Financial Remedies Court pilot, which he says is working well, and which he is confident  “will be a successful and popular development”, and also the guidance he issued in December regarding the anonymisation of family law judgments involving children, that he hopes will be applied by all Family Courts.

And that, really, was about it. Not that I’m complaining. Indeed, it is refreshing to have a President who is (for the moment at least) a little less proactive. Busy family law professionals have enough to do to keep up with new developments as it is – perhaps Sir Andrew is purposely giving them less to think about, in order to reduce the risk of burn-out!

The full text of the View can be found here.

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Author: John Bolch

Family Mediation Week Day 5: Planning For The Future

Day 5 of Family Mediation Week’s theme is “A Ray of Sunshine; What a Relief”

Today is the last day of Family Mediation Week.

Once again there is a lot of very helpful information, including videos, blogs and articles available from the Family Mediation Week website (http://www.familymediationweek.org.uk/).

These look towards the end of the process and people being able to move on.

For example, there is a video by Bill Hewlett recording how relieved children feel that they have been listened to, they no longer feel they are caught in the middle and they can go on and enjoy the rest of their childhood.

There are also articles about the importance of everyone looking after themselves, mentally and physically, as they go through the process of separation and moving on.

This is accompanied by another piece focusing on the future and having a clear plan in order to make the best of life.

Mediation is all about helping families to find fair solutions which work for everyone.

Mediation requires commitment and effort by everyone concerned, the couple and the Mediator or Mediators, it is not necessarily an easy process but if it does result in fair, workable solutions the gains are enormous.

Mediation is just one of several ways of resolving issues when families separate. As such, it should always be considered.

Legal advice is vital no matter what process a couple choose to follow.

Legal advice can support and assist the Mediation process so couples can make proper informed decisions.

Family Mediation Week has been an enormous success, the material produced is of first class quality and at Stowe Family Law we are committed to helping our clients identify the process which will work best for them and their families. Stowe Family Law is able to offer mediation services in a number of our offices so if you are interested in hearing more get in touch.

You can read our previous Mediation Week posts here:

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Author: Graham Coy

A Week In Family Law: A Domestic Abuse Bill, the myth of common law marriage, and more

And what a busy week it’s been!

First up, the Civil Partnerships, Marriages and Deaths (Registration Etc) Bill received its second reading in the House of Lords. The Bill, which provides, amongst other things, that opposite sex couples may enter into a civil partnership, will now proceed to the committee stage in the House of Lords.

The big news was the unveiling by the government of its draft Domestic Abuse Bill, which it calls “the most comprehensive package ever to tackle domestic abuse.” The Bill is “aimed at supporting victims and their families and pursuing offenders.” Its main provisions include the first ever statutory government definition of domestic abuse to specifically include economic abuse and controlling and manipulative non-physical abuse; the establishment of a Domestic Abuse Commissioner to drive the response to domestic abuse issues; the introduction of new Domestic Abuse Protection Notices and Domestic Abuse Protection Orders to further protect victims and place restrictions on the actions of offenders; and the prohibition of the cross-examination of victims by their abusers in the family courts. For further details of the Bill see this brief summary I wrote here on Monday. The Bill has been generally welcomed by interested parties. Katie Ghose, Chief Executive of Women’s Aid, said that it “has the potential to create a step change in the national response” to domestic abuse, and Suzanne Jacob OBE, Chief Executive of the domestic abuse charity SafeLives, said: “We welcome the government’s set of proposals, particularly putting a greater focus on perpetrator accountability, both through the legal system, civil powers, and programmes that seek to change abusive behaviour.” Let us just hope that the present political uncertainty does not derail the Bill (the prohibition of the cross-examination of victims provision has already been delayed a year and a half by the last general election).

The next big story was not actually news, at least not to all family lawyers. This year’s British Social Attitudes Survey, carried out by The National Centre for Social Research, found that almost half of all people in England and Wales mistakenly believe that unmarried couples who live together have a common law marriage and enjoy the same rights as couples that are legally married. The findings reveal that 46% of the population are under the wrong impression that cohabiting couples form a common law marriage – a figure that remains largely unchanged over the last fourteen years (47% in 2005), despite a significant increase in the number of cohabiting couples. In contrast, only 41% of respondents to the survey rightly say cohabiting couples are not in a common law marriage. Interestingly, the survey showed that people are significantly more likely to believe in common law marriage when they have children – 55% of households with children think that common law marriage exists, whilst only 41% of households without any children do so. Commenting on the figures Anne Barlow, Professor of Family Law and Policy at the University of Exeter, which commissioned the survey, said: “Cohabiting couples now account for the fastest growing type of household and the number of opposite sex cohabiting couple families with dependent children has more than doubled in the last decade. Yet whilst people’s attitudes towards marriage and cohabitation have shifted, policy has failed to keep up with the times. The result is often severe financial hardship for the more vulnerable party in the event of separation, such as women who have interrupted their career to raise children. Therefore, it’s absolutely crucial that we raise awareness of the difference between cohabitation, civil partnership and marriage and any differences in rights that come with each.” Exactly. We must continue to try to raise awareness, and also press for basic property rights for (former) cohabitees.

And finally, almost unnoticed amongst all the other news, this has been Family Mediation Week, an annual campaign organised by The Family Mediators Association which “aims to raise awareness of mediation and how it can help separating families manage their issues collaboratively and productively.” For further information, I would refer the reader to the series of posts here on the subject this week from Stowe Family Law partner Graham Coy, who is himself a member of the Association.

Have a good weekend.

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Author: John Bolch

Family Mediation Week Day 4: Learn to respect for the benefit of the children

Day 4 of Family Mediation Week’s theme is “the clouds are parting”.

Previously this week, as supporters of mediation and Family Mediation Week, we have focused on:

  • The mediation process
  • The substantial advantages compared to the court process
  • How children can become involved in the mediation process
  • How important it is for the children’s views to be heard
  • What children need to know when their parents are separating

Today, the Family Mediation website contains an article as to how mediation can help parties find clarity and break through any stalemate that may have risen and how separating couples can learn to respect one another especially for the benefit of their children.

Those children will remain part of the couple’s lives forever and parents need to find a way to communicate with one another, respect one another for the benefit of their children so they can find happiness and contentment as they grow up.

Also featured is “The Handover Book” to help parents communicate with one another as the children spend time with each of them. It is a useful resource.

Finally, there is another article explaining in a little bit more detail how financial matters are dealt with during the mediation.

Stowe Family Law supports mediation and is proud to support the initiative of Family Mediation Week. We have skilled and experienced mediators who can provide all the advantages which mediation offers. There contact details are below.

Sushma Kotecha, Nottingham Office, 0115 759 4534, sushma.kotecha@stowefamilylaw.co.uk

Graham Coy, London Chancery Lane Office, 020 7421 3300, graham.coy@stowefamilylaw.co.uk

Gavin Scott, London Chancery Lane Office, 020 7421 3300, gavin.scott@stowefamilylaw.co.uk

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Author: Graham Coy

Stowe guests: Should you stay together for the children by Anna Sinski

In this instalment of Stowe guests, we are joined by Anna Sinski, a BACP-accredited integrative psychotherapist and counsellor working with clients in central London and online.

Anna helps individuals going through difficult life changes, including divorce and she joins us today to discuss how a divorce may actually benefit your children.

Chances are, you’ve heard loads of people say, “We should stay together for the kids.” Maybe you’ve even said it yourself. But despite the media and society demonizing the impact of divorce on kids, staying together often has far worse outcomes. In fact, separating may benefit your children. It all comes down to how you deal with it during and after the actual divorce.

Relationship models

First of all, I think it’s useful to explore the fact that we are (whether we realise it or not) role models for our children. They learn to imitate our behaviour and language from the youngest years and it doesn’t stop there. We are essentially their first relationship models too. It is from their parents that kids learn what relationships look like and what they should expect from their future partners. This is where they learn how relationships work, the female and male role, as well as acceptable boundaries and behaviours of both sides.

That being said, you might imagine that divorce depicts a relationship model of bitterness or a broken family. However, the truth is that it really depends on how you handle it in front of your children. Essentially, divorce highlights a relationship model where you have the option to leave if you’re unhappy. A relationship model where you deserve to be fulfilled and search for happiness, as well as one where you are allowed to change your mind.

Now imagine a reality where the child watches the parents argue and live bitter, unhappy lives for years. The relationship model they will get from that can be one where the child comes to believe that no matter what happens and no matter the unhappiness, they must endure any relationship. While in some cultures this form of sacrifice might be desirable, is that really the key to a fulfilled life?

You also have no way of knowing how years of an unhappy marriage will make you appear as a parent overall. To a large extent, the quality of our relationships defines the quality of our lives. The less happy we are in our relationships, the more likely it is that our overall happiness in other areas of life will go down. When you suffer, your child might suffer that emotional burden as well, especially because children are excellent at picking up on any tension in the air. All in all, this can be more stressful for the child in the long term. It is usually better for the child to have two happy homes than a single miserable one.

Conflict resolution

There is also a lot that kids can learn from divorce in terms of conflict resolution. Seeing two parents work through their differences while maintaining appropriate boundaries and remaining respectful is a great lesson. Using the “conflict” between you as parents as a model can teach your children how to deal with many potential disputes and difficulties throughout their lives. Moreover, it shows the kids that conflict in itself is not the end of the world and that it can be resolved peacefully.

More focused time

After the divorce (or during separation) your childcare arrangements are likely to become more structured. For one, this means that your child gets to know you more as an individual. But more importantly, this usually means they actually get more quality time with you. We’re all busy with various responsibilities, but the reality is that shared child care forces you to plan the time you are going to spend with your son or daughter. This, in turn, makes it much easier to set this time aside fully for their benefit and plan your other responsibilities for some other time or day. Thanks to this necessary planning, your children are more likely to get your undivided attention, which will make them feel more “seen”.

They learn to be more empathetic

Many marriages end in divorce and your child most likely has (or will have) some friends going through this experience. Having gone through it themselves, they will be more empathetic towards other children. This kind of experience can generally positively influence a child’s empathy towards others going through all sorts of life situations. Similarly, sharing an experience such as a divorce of the parents can make siblings more empathetic towards one another.

The impact that your divorce will have on your kids is ultimately up to you – the parents. It doesn’t have to be a traumatizing event in any way and it might not leave any negative consequences on your children. By making sure your kids are not forced to “choose” or stand in the middle of your fights, you can both end up being positive role models for them in many different ways.

Get in touch

If you would like to book a session with Anna, please call or text to 07376 041102 or send an e-mail to: anna.m.sinski@gmail.com

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Author: Stowe Family Law

Mother ordered to return child to different country from where he was removed

Well this is an unusual one. I don’t recall ever previously hearing of a Hague Convention child abduction case in which the court ordered the return of the child to a different country to the one from where they were removed. But that is exactly what happened in the recent High Court case S v D (Hague Convention: Domestic Abuse: Undertakings: Return to Third State).

The facts of the case were that the parents were both Hungarian nationals. They were married, and had one child, a boy aged 4 years 3 months. In early 2017 the family moved from Hungary to Germany. Thereafter, the marriage broke down and the parents separated in March 2018, when they travelled from Germany to Hungary for a short holiday, and after a few days the father returned to Germany. Shortly thereafter the mother and the child travelled to England. The mother did not return the child, and the father made an application under the Hague Convention for him to be summarily returned to Hungary.

The mother opposed the application, on the grounds that there was a grave risk that the return of the child would expose him to physical or psychological harm.

The application went before Mr Justice Cobb.

He was satisfied that the removal of the child from Germany in March 2018 was wrongful and in breach of the father’s rights of custody (this was not in issue). He said that the evidence was inconsistent with the mother’s case that the father knew that she was intending to travel to England, certainly on a permanent basis, but even if he was wrong about wrongful removal, he was absolutely satisfied that the retention was wrongful – there was no evidence that the father agreed to a permanent relocation, and it was not said that he acquiesced in the same.

Turning to the mother’s ‘harm’ defence, Mr Justice Cobb was satisfied that the father had displayed violence to her, both historically and recently. However, he was also satisfied by the various undertakings offered by the father, including to pay for the mother to return to Hungary with the child, not to assault, harass, threaten, or molest the mother or the child, not to remove the child from the care and control of the mother save for the purposes of any agreed contact, and to provide as soon as possible for the mother a two-bedroomed apartment in the city in Hungary where the father lives. These undertakings were sufficient to protect the mother and child from harm.

Accordingly, Mr Justice Cobb was prepared to order the return of the child, and he did so, after receiving the undertakings in written form, signed by the father.

As to the ‘different country’ point, he said:

“…this case has been … rendered the more unusual by the fact that the applicant seeks the return of [the child] to a ‘third state’. I dispose of this aspect now. [Counsel for the mother] submits that it would be “exceptional” for a court to order a ‘return’ to a third state. I am loath to use the word ‘exceptional’ because to do so would be to overstate the position; further, ‘exceptional’ is one of those words which once used tends to acquire quasi-statutory authority in a wholly unintended way. For my part, I would be prepared to accept that it will be an unusual case where the court will order a return to a third state, but it is in principle unobjectionable, and each case will be fact-sensitive. As it is, the mother would, it seems to me be more greatly disadvantaged in the return order being made to Germany – a country where, she says, she never wanted to live. At least in Hungary she has family and some support.”

All of which seems to me to be eminently sensible. Apart from any disadvantage to the mother in being made to return to Germany, it seems quite clear on the facts of the case that Hungary is the child’s true ‘home’ country, and that it is the courts of that country that should make any necessary decisions as to his long-term future.

You can read the full judgment here.

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Author: John Bolch

Family Mediation Week: Finding a new resolution to family break up

Family mediation offers clients a smarter and more dignified way to resolve family disputes as opposed to the traditional solicitor led and court route approach.

It is an opportunity for parties to meet with an impartial third-party: the mediator who will give pragmatic guidance and legal information to help them reach their own resolutions. This is known as ‘assisted negotiation’.

When separating couples are at a point of crisis the first point of call will be to seek legal advice from a family solicitor and in many cases, the issues can only be resolved via legal intervention. This however, is not the only option available, mediation can be a better alternative when it is assessed as a suitable forum by the mediator.

Benefits of family mediation

By choosing mediation the parties can:

  • Explore all issues arising out of their relationship break up in complete confidence
  • Be impartially informed about and evaluate possible choices
  • Find common ground
  • Work at a pace agreed and controlled by them
  • Work at their own negotiated agenda
  • Find compromise solutions
  • Agree to disagree but reach partial understandings
  • Look forward without judgements about the past
  • Gain understanding, trust and work on better communication
  • Model a co-operative future relationship and not further conflict
  • Think together about their children’s needs and future well-being
  • Work to find comprehensive solutions to all issues including finance, property and children’s arrangements

In addition, mediation reduces financial costs and limits the stress and anxiety that the parties will experience during the relationship break up.

Research studies have shown that family disputes resolved via mediation are less acrimonious than those that are settled through the court system. Furthermore, decisions made by the parties in mediation are more likely to be kept as opposed to court-imposed orders.

Mediation works best when supported by expert family solicitors who should ideally, be instructed from the outset of the mediation process to advise and assist the parties throughout.

When agreements are reached in mediation, if considered necessary these can be converted into legal binding orders by consent with the help of the parties’ solicitors.

Meet the mediators

I strongly support the use of mediation when managing a relationship breakdown, and I am an Accredited Family Mediator.  My contact details are below along with the other mediators in our team:

 

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Author: Sushma Kotecha

Family Mediation Week Day 3: Useful reading material

Day three of Family Mediation Week focuses on the children and child-inclusive mediation, which has already been mentioned by us earlier this week and allows the children to have a voice in the mediation process, and also explains how mediation can help deal with the financial issues.

There is a lot of very useful material available at the website. 

This includes an article by Bill Hewlett “so why should children be included in mediation”, explaining why giving children a voice in the mediation process can be so important, especially for them.

Also featured is an article by the Chair of the Family Mediators Association, Philippa Johnson, emphasising the importance of prioritising the children and communication.

Marcia Mediation explains what mediation is about and how it can be paid for, not just in relation to children but also in relation to the finances as well.

Resolving the financial issues following separation or divorce in mediation is no different from resolving the financial issues through court proceedings.

It is a two-stage process:

Finding out exactly what there is in the way of assets, property, liabilities, pensions and income.
Dividing those fairly, taking into account all the relevant circumstances of each and every case; no circumstances are ever the same.

As we have explained before during the course of Family Mediation Week, mediation can be far quicker, far cheaper and gives those involved in the mediation process an opportunity to be at the forefront of framing an agreement, rather than a judge dictating what the solution is going to be.

Finally, there is a useful article warning of the pitfalls which can undermine resolving matters easily and quickly.

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Author: Graham Coy

Tales and myths of a common law marriage

Nearly half of people in England and Wales believe that unmarried couples living together have the same rights and obligations as couples who are legally married or who have entered into a civil partnership.

This could not be further from the truth. In fact, common law marriage is a complete myth.

Research just undertaken by the University of Exeter and the National Centre for Social Research, shows that 46% of those asked, believe that unmarried couples living together (cohabiting couples) were part of a common law marriage and, as a result, had equal protection to married couples in the event of their relationship breaking down.

Cohabitation does not provide any legal status to a couple living together.

At the same time, cohabiting couples now account for the fastest growing household in England and Wales.  The number of opposite sex cohabiting couple families with dependent children has almost doubled in the last decade and nearly 50% of children are born to parents who are not married.

The difference between cohabiting couples and couples who are married or in a civil partnership could not be more significant.

In the event of a couple living together but not married or in a civil partnership, separating, the result is often, according to the University of Exeter, severe financial hardship for the more vulnerable financially weaker party.

For example, there is no right to claim maintenance, there is no ability to share pensions and there is no ability to share property unless that property is jointly owned.

The University of Exeter concludes by saying “it is absolutely critical that we raise awareness of the difference between cohabitation, civil partnership and marriage and any differences and rights that come with each.”

This is not a new issue.

Previous governments have been advised by the Law Commission, an independent body which advises governments on the need for law reform, that they needed to act.  The Law Commission even drafted a Bill to go before parliament.  Some limited protection was put in place in Scotland but not in England and Wales.

The need for reform and change could not be more urgent.

In the meantime, we can offer some practical advice.

If you are thinking of living with someone and not getting married, or if you already are living with someone, consider entering into a “living together agreement” and also consider whether any documents should be drawn up in relation to any property which you may own, for example setting out your rights in relation to that property, when it could be sold and what happens on sale.

If, on the other hand, you are thinking of separating from your partner, or already have, don’t give up.  If you have children, there are certainly ways of obtaining financial support for them, including the provision of a home, and it may be that even if the property is in the name of your partner, you may still have certain rights in relation to it.

At Stowe we have a number of solicitors, including myself, who specialise in cohabitation, please do contact us at the details below.

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Author: Graham Coy

Do I need to make a will?

I am often asked “do I need to make a will” and of course the answer I give varies depending on who is asking the question.

As a solicitor specialising in wills and probate, I am sure that I should answer the question with an emphatic “of course you should”, but everyone’s circumstances and wishes will differ and there are those rare cases when a will may not be required.

I think what people should ask themselves is “what would happen if I died without making a will?”

I have detailed below some key points to consider:

Registering the death and arranging the funeral

Believe it or not, this is where an estimated 18% of family feuds following the death of a loved one occur.  There can be initial uncertainty as to whether you wanted to be buried or cremated, and this can be distressing to family members with whom you may not have had this conversation during your lifetime.

If there are arguments, it can delay the funeral as funeral directors are increasingly afraid to release the body until an agreement has been reached.

Who is the rightful “next of kin” and how do you prove it in the first few days after death?

It is much simpler to state in a will who you would want to appoint as an Executor to deal with the administration of your estate and what your funeral wishes are rather than try to provide documentation to prove you are the next of kin.

Dealing with financial Institutions and insurance companies

We all know that with data protection legislation in place it can be quite difficult to contact companies to speak about your own affairs, without having to answer multiple questions and passwords to confirm your identity.

Imagine what that may be like trying to speak about your loved one’s affairs with the institutions refusing to deal with you unless you can prove why you have the authority to deal with the estate.

An Executor under a will has the authority to act from the date of death and can prove this by providing the death certificate and will.  If there is no will, the person who wishes to deal with the administration of the Estate must make an application to the Court/Probate Registry to be appointed.

This can take many weeks, even months, and again may lead to disputes, especially if more than one family member has an equal right to apply.  Surely it is easier to appoint an Executor in a will?

Without a will, who would inherit my estate?

If you don’t have a will, the distribution of your Estate is governed by a set of rules referred to as the Intestacy Rules.  Under these rules, only your spouse or civil partner and other close family members may inherit your Estate depending upon its value.  The list is a hierarchy with preference given to family members who are more closely related.  It does not matter whether you are separated or getting divorced from your spouse or civil partner, they are still entitled to a share of your Estate.

Not all parents wish to make an equal provision for their children on death.  You may already have made lifetime gifts to one child and wish to equalise matters between your children on death.  One child may have additional needs, or your children may be under the age of 18 years old.  Who would look after them and be appointed as guardian?  Do you want them to inherit at 18? What if you do not see your children and do not wish to leave them anything?

The Intestacy Rules should not be a substitute for putting careful thought into making a will that is right for your unique circumstances. We are lucky in England to have testamentary freedom, which is not available in many European countries.  Testamentary freedom being the ability to leave our assets to whomever we like.

So, the question I ask you now is, do you want peace of mind that you have set out your wishes following your death?  Do you need to make a will?

If you need to make a will please contact me, Wendy Scarr at the contact details below.

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Author: Wendy Scarr